Ordinary Words Can Steer The Whole Negotiation Process Into A Tailspin

Certain words used when you’re negotiating can totally change the outcome of a business deal. In most cases, the actual words are not the problem; it’s the way you use them that has a great impact. Words can change perception in a split of a second. In negotiations, the most common words can often be misinterpreted, or used inappropriately. These have the power to steer the bargaining process are create a lot of confusion.

“Need”

How often do you hear the word “need” when negotiating a deal? From an objective perspective, it is a common word that seems to denote “priority”. A lot of business individuals who are attempting to speed up negotiations use it – “I need this”. If you were to ask an opponent to give you the definition of the word, he would probably say that it’s something required to survive. If that’s the case, what will happen if they don’t get what they “need”?

Using this word for hours in a row will eventually drive people crazy. The atmosphere in the room becomes really tense, and eventually nobody will get anything. When the emotional side of the brain interferes in a business negotiation process, people can’t think straight anymore.

“Understand”

When used inappropriately, this word can destroy your efforts of negotiating a deal. It’s a huge mistake to link decision-making with understanding, and if you’re not careful enough, everything you did up to that moment will be in vain. Don’t over-think your bargaining tactics and avoid as much as possible asking the same question over and over again – “Did you understand?”

Most business people enter meetings determined to make opponents understand a concept, an idea or thought. When you try too much, you risk creating confusion. In the end, your opponents will say – “We’ll think it over and get back to you”. Don’t over use the word “understand” too often; you risk annoying the audience and to keep you quiet, they’ll just say “yes” every time you ask “Do you understand what I mean?”

Science tells us that when the wrong side of our brain is stroke with information and facts, we instantly object. This leads to poor decision-making, and what’s worse is that we’re used to repeating the process. In the hopes of trying to make others “understand” what we want to say, we eventually create uncertainty. Facts, arguments and claims are intellectual. Visualizing a problem and finding a solution is emotional.

Having a vision, finding a solution

A negotiator’s most important job when closing deals is to foster a sense of purpose and not obstruct the mind with too many facts and figures. Use your words in a more strategic manner and do your best to create a positive emotion. Negotiators don’t want to be taught anything, so they don’t have to “understand” anything. They should be enticed by what you’re saying, grasp your vision and choose to act.

Decisions drive vision in a business negotiation

One particular word in negotiations – “see” – can go a long way. When you’re paying attention to what others are saying, you’ll hear the word we just mention a lot. Phrases such as “I see what you mean”, or questions “Do you see what I’m trying to say here?” underline the great importance of foreseeing solutions.

If you want business partners to see you and notice your proposal, they must first “see” the problem, and then turn their attention to the solution you’re providing. If you want engage them and awake their interest, you should stop beating around the bush. Don’t use tactics and words meant to stir their emotions because you risk creating unnecessary tension. And when tension is created, people become anxious and uncomfortable.

Winning negotiations is all about having the right attitude and using the right words, negotiation workshops can also help you in this. If you’re not paying attention to your opponent, this shows you don’t care; and if you use words that are meant to demand something, you risk losing their interest. Whatever you do don’t forget that the purpose of a negotiation is to reach a mutual agreement. Fostering professional relationships is equally important. This shows that you’re devoted to a goal, and that you’re not afraid to compromise.